Spider In The Shower

Welcome back to another day in the life of Emma Clark. In Belgium, the country where Wind and Rain and Cold are the residents and Sun seems to have decided it has overstayed its welcome... Basically what I'm trying to say is that it's cold and gross again here, and I, once again, find myself not feeling very well.

It is now story time with Emma. Today's feature, "The Two Intelligent Girls". Ahem.

Once upon a time, there were two very intelligent American exchange students. Their names were Emma and Talia and they were going to school in Hannut, Belgium. One day, they went to school and were supposed to take their exam for gym: 3 kilometers running and about 8 kilometers bike riding in one hour and a half. Emma and Talia were very ready to take this exam and felt good about their chances of passing. They went through their first two hours of school as usual and after the pause, went to the gym to meet the others and take their exam. However, once they got there, they realized that they were supposed to go at the beginning of the pause instead of the end. By this time, it was too late! The teachers had already left with the class and there was nobody there. The door was locked. So Emma and Talia missed their gym exam and spent the two hours in the office of the nice priest, Père Boly, feeling exceptionally smart about the mistake that they had made. The end.

Ok if you didn't pick up on that, that was sarcasm. We felt exceptionally DUMB. Other than that, the day went as usual. School, went home, ate with the fam, which tonight's meal was leftovers from the communion yesterday.

OK here's a weird Belgium thing. They think leftovers are like, the spawn of Satan. Ok that's a little overdramatic, but seriously. There is nothing wrong with leftovers! And if you don't eat it right away, they throw it out! Which I don't like. I'm all for cold leftovers the day after. But as I'm not feeling well, I couldn't finish the rice that they got rid of. Even though it was only opened yesterday. Oh Belgium...

Otherwise nothing happened. Oh yes, the title of my blog. I'm pretty sure there was a spider in the shower when I took mine just now... The reason I say pretty sure is because I had already taken out my contacts, so I just saw a black blob that resembled something with legs... On my leg. Ew.

This post is spiratic and weird... Oh well it happens. I'm going to bed early; I really am not feeling hot... Bonne nuit tout le monde.

ITALY!!! Part III

Ok here we go again. Picking up at Day 6.

Day 6: This was the day that we went to the island of Capri! This was probably the low point of the trip, which doesn't say much, cause it was still incredible. But I did have some issues... So to get to Capri you have to take a boat across part of the Mediterranean Sea. I mean, you don't really have a choice. Well, I have a fear of puking. It's my phobia. I'm scared to death of it. So anything could potentially cause me to throw up causes me great panic. So I was all prepared that day with my Dramamine that I took at breakfast and my instant relief pills also. Of course, I was still a little bit shaken up for it. And of course, the only day we have to take a boat, it's gross outside. It was cold and the sky was threatening to empty itself onto us. So needless to say, I was kinda freaking out. But I had no choice but to get on the boat with everyone else.

I tried very hard to keep calm. I had given my camera to Jordann to take pictures since my memory card was freaking out and we put hers in my nice Canon. I was sitting on the top of the boat talking to people and trying so very hard to stay calm. And to be honest, everything was fine for the first half hour. I was talking to people, laughing, having good conversation, and not feeling anything from the boat. Then all of the sudden, it started to move. All over the place. Ok it wasn't THAT bad, but still, it was rocking. So I, being the crazy that I am, jumped out of my seat and started jumping and running around the boat, thinking that the more I moved, the less I would feel the boat moving. But that only lasted so long before I started to REALLY freak out. So I went downstairs and ended up with the Rotary people who were trying to calm me down. And I was doing ok, but I could feel a nice anxiety attack coming on. It got worse with each rock of the boat, even though my stomach really was fine and it was all mental. Before I knew it, I was in the heat of a terrible anxiety attack and I was crying and hyperventilating a bit... One of the nice Rotary ladies gave me some anti-stress drops and we soon arrived on the shore of Capri.

The next thing on the schedule was for everyone to get on yet another boat, a smaller one, and do a tour around the island. But I knew I couldn't do it. You see, my parents had been there before and they had done that tour. And when they did it, there was a little Japanese woman on the boat who was oh so very ill, getting sick over the side of the boat the whole time. Well I had this story in my head, the anxiety attack going on in my body, and knowing the fact that I would be stuck on that boat for an hour and a half with no way of getting off, I could not do it. There was another girl, Justine, who was also sick, so one of the other Rotary ladies stayed with us on shore while the others went on the tour. We found a cafe, drank tea, and just tried to calm down. Once everyone else got back, I was sure I had made the right decision, even though I was so upset to let something like my own thoughts stop me from doing that. But apparently it was ridiculously rough and it was a very good thing that I didn't go.

We then got into more little buses and were driven up to the village of Anacapri on the island to visit. We were given free time to walk around, eat, shop, etc. We started off in a nice shop full of clothing where I bought a silk dress and a wrap gypsy skirt, despite my turning tummy. We ate at a lovely little place, even though I could not even imagine eating, even hours after I had gotten off the boat. I ate just some bread and a little bit of a salad, even though my tummy was growling. I couldn't bring myself to stomach anything else. We spent some more time just walking around and taking pictures and enjoying the beauty of the island, even though the weather wasn't very nice. We also had an encounter in a café where Oakley was charged 7 euros (or some outrageous price like that) for a Coke because we had sat down and they charge you for that. Well she didn't drink it, didn't pay for it, and we saved another woman from making the same mistake. Regardless, Savannah ended up drinking and paying for a hot chocolate.

Eventually, we met back up with the rest of the Rotary to get back in the buses and go down to another village on the island. We had more time to walk around and explore. This time, we couldn't even go into the stores, they were all so expensive. We're talking Gucci and Dolce & Gabana. But we did come across some Italians with "Free Hugs" signs, and of course we stopped to hug them all. Which was wonderful! The guys weren't too bad looking either ;)

By this point, it was time to get back on the boat to go back to the hotel... And of course, I had plenty of time to psych myself out. I made myself eat some more bread, take two "knock out" pills (to attempt to sleep through the ride) and tried very hard to stay calm, even though the weather was starting to kick up again and it was beginning to get windy. But we got on the boat, this one bigger and more stable, and I stood right in the back by the motor. It wasn't so bad. Obviously, I wasn't feeling so well and I was not tired enough to sleep, but I somehow made it through. And went back to the hotel and everything was ok.

We had dinner at the hotel, though I didn't eat much, and some of the other girls and I were so tired, we just decided to have movie night in my room. We pushed all the beds together and put on "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" and crashed for a couple hours. We then went right to bed to be ready for the next day.

Day 7: Day 7 started out with us packing everything up and getting ready to go towards our next destination. We had our breakfast, took packed lunches from the hotel, packed up the bus and were off. Today, we started off with a visit to Pompeii. We all fell asleep on the way, but we went through the guided tour as energetically as we could. Though this guide was even harder to understand than the last one... The accent was impossible. But of course, Savannah and I and Jordann ended up kinda getting split off from the group so we amused ourselves. After Pompeii, we did a little shopping, I bought a ring for 30 euros (originally 45, I bargained it down) that he told me was all real and I have since found otherwise, and we got back on the bus for an afternoon of driving. This time, we all really fell asleep on the bus, only to stop at a rest stop on the highway for a break and to eat our packed lunches. Not gonna lie, they weren't very good... But I don't like fatty lunch meat. Anyways, we then got back on the bus to go to towards Tuscany and settle down at our next hotel.

We got there fairly early, at dinner, this time with four courses. We started off with little finger food appetizers, followed by pasta, of course, and then a meat and vegetables course. I wasn't very hungry and I could barely finish the pasta. And it wasn't at the same level as the other hotels. Dessert was an ice cream cake type slice of something... But I won't go into detail because it wasn't amazing like the rest. But that night, since we had time, we all decided that we wanted to go out. We had to be back by 11 30 and Rotary told us that if we were all back on time, we would get a surprise the next day. Well this was a Saturday night. So we figured there would be a club or something that we could go to. So we all got dolled up, I wore my new Capri dress and heels, and went out on the town in search of something fun to do. Well news flash, there was NOTHING. We found one bar, but way high class, too expensive, and no dancing. So we basically ended up walking around all night, looking for something to do. We did come across a discotech, but by that time it was too late to pay the 10 euro entry fee since we had to be back at 11 30. Then we found an outdoor concert type thing with a bar, but nobody wanted to stay there because the Rotary guys were there. So finally, Savannah, Minna, Maddie, a few other people and I decided to just go back to that first bar. We had a drink, had some fun, and were back in the hotel on time, ready to go to bed. We got ready for bed, disappointed, but knowing we at least had fun ourselves.

Day 8: As usual, we started off with breakfast at the hotel, and then we got on the bus and were off to Florence (Firenze), in the region of Tuscany for the morning! We got there, and wow is it beautiful. We spent the morning with Rotary, doing a tour with Andre in our four groups. We saw a lot of beautiful buildings, including one gorgeous church where various saints are buried. Of course, this started some very philosophical conversation between exchange students, which was a very good thing to have. Bonding time :)

We saw a lot of statues, including a replica of the David statue, people pretending to be statues and then making you pay them if you interact with them, government buildings, fountains, and these really cool chain barriers that were COVERED in locks that people had put, like in Rome in the first day, with the name of them and their boyfriend/girlfriend. I just love the whole concept of that... Next, we were each given 10 euros by Rotary to go find lunch and have free time. I went with Savannah and Maddie and we walked around the whole city looking for something cheap but authentic to eat. But a word to the wise, Florence is not cheap. We finally found ourselves at a nice little place, our bellies rumbling. We started off with, of course, bruschetta. This one was just tomatoes and basil and olive oil. But still, I don't understand how they make tomatoes taste SO incredible. I don't even like tomatoes... We also got a salad and a pizza to share. The pizza had ham on it too, which I typically don't like if there is not pineapple involved, but this was really delicious. Overall, we had a fantastic meal, even though it took forever to get the check... But regardless, it was wonderful.

We spent the afternoon walking around, looking around at the street vendors and making some more gift purchases. We also got gelato, of course. But I couldn't finish mine in the end, and gave it to someone else to finish. I also found a pin for my blazer that day. However, as beautiful as it was, we did have to leave eventually to meet back up with Rotary and go to our next stop: Pisa.

We drove for a while, but finally got there. They warned us that the moment we got off the bus, we would be attacked by street vendors trying to sell us jewelry, sunglasses, and who knows what else. Well they weren't kidding. That was the worst it was. But we got through the crowd to the shuttle bus to get us to Pisa. We got safely there, only to quickly realize that there really is only one thing in Pisa: the leaning tower. And the whole road that leads up to it was lined with more vendors and people calling out to us, calling us to come buy things. They called us Lady Gaga too, which I thought was especially odd as we look nothing like her... Well we did get to the tower and we definitely took our share of touristy pictures, holding up the tower, hugging it, I even did one where I have my leg around it... Classy, I know. And really, it's leaning. Like, crazy leaning. But it was cool to see, especially since it was such a nice day and it was up against a blue sky. We did not have much time there though, so we had to book it back to the shuttles to catch one back down the bus.

We then drove back to our hotel for dinner. And Rotary told us what our surprise was. Or what it was supposed to be, rather. They had planned on taking us all out to a discotech together. But the problem is that it was Sunday night and the law in Italy states that minors cannot go out on Sunday nights. And at least half of the exchange students are minors. Plus we didn't have much time. They told us that if we were majors, we could go out if we wanted to, but had to be back semi early and had to wake up at 5 30am the next morning. So in the end, the majority of us decided it was not worth it and we had a second movie night. This time, the feature film was "John Tucker Must Die". However, we had to stop it for the last ten minutes because we were so exhausted.

Part IV, the final chapter, coming soon to Emma's blog.

I'm Baaaack

So here I am, fresh off the bus from a crazy couple weeks traveling around Europe. And I'm exhausted. And sick. My voice is totally gone. But it was ENTIRELY worth it.

However, it's it 1am here. And I really need to sleep. So here's the deal. I will not post tonight, but instead do two posts tomorrow, one for Paris and one for Italy. Obviously the Paris one will be shorter than the Italy one. But regardless, hopefully by the end of the night tomorrow there will be two brand-spankin-new posts up for everyone to read and enjoy! Because I had an incredible couple of weeks and I sure hope that you can all enjoy my posts as much as I enjoy the things they talk about.

Right now I have a bed full of luggage awaiting me... Sounds like a run activity before sleeping... Unpacking...

Bonne nuit tout le monde !

Sick Sick Sick Sick Sick

I stayed home again Tuesday because I was sick. I have this terrible cough which is causing my throat to hurt, and I'm almost positive that I had a fever Monday night. It's just a nasty cold, but it was enough to keep me in bed until noon on Tuesday. Unfortunately, I had to go to a Rotary meeting on Tuesday night, regardless of my physical state. So around 6 30pm, I got myself up off the couch and Karine came to get me to go to the meeting.

It was a rather calm and uneventful meeting. We had a sort of shrimp scampi, followed by lamb stew with potatoes and apple cake with strawberries for dessert. However, I never did taste the dessert because I became once again very ill, but this time with the worst chest pains/heartburn I've ever had in my life. We had two men presenting something about some sort of organization having something to do with the Jews doing World War II, but to be honest, I hardly heard a word of it as I was pretty sure my heart was exploding. Finally, towards the end of the presentation, I was able to leave the room and go outside and get some air. Thankfully, one of the Rotary men is a doctor who speaks decent English, and as I couldn't find the words to describe the sensation I was having other than "my chest hurts, my chest hurts", it was fortunate to have him there. He was pretty sure it was a bout of acid reflux. Yuck. But I went home, drank a bunch of water, took a good hour and half to fall asleep, but woke up the next morning completely fine. Even my cold seemed to be decently diminished.

Wednesday was yesterday, our half day, and nothing happened out of the usual. School, lunch, hang with the host fam and talk to a couple friends. The only thing was that it was super nice outside and I walked home, which did me a lot of good. Having the sun shining on my back as I walked along without a coat on was glorious.

Today, it also was beautiful out. So during our study, the exchange students went over to that spot in the middle of Hannut. Remember? Where we hung out for Aymeric's birthday way back when? Mikayla and I took a little rush to the grocery store to get grapes and raisins (where they were playing Ice Ice Baby and we rocked out, getting weird looks) and then we just all hung out in the sun, eating our various forms of fruit. We got out of class early and did the same thing after school. I then walked home again, which I enjoy more than I remember in the States. I also had dance tonight, which wasn't terrible, but I'm still kinda down on the fact that I really feel like I've lost some of it since I got here... But now I'm exhausted and it's sleepy time. À demain !

Dress Rehearsal Day Two

Today we had our second day of general repetition at school for the theater show. The dancers got to go in late, and after waking up sick with a sore throat and a cough, I was very grateful. I ate breakfast here and then sludged off to school, where I stayed from around 12 30 to 6 30. We rehearsed through the whole show and I'm fairly convinced that all the dances are going to end being really good and go very well for the actual show, especially "Bad Romance". We finally started adding all the actors in at the end and they all seem to be as excited about it as I am!

After rehearsal, I went home and ate dinner with my host family. We had turkey, and I explained to them that turkey makes you tired, though I couldn't remember the reason why. They had never heard that before. But I wish I could remember why that happens...

I am sick and exhausted and going to bed. Goodnight all.

Sick And Tired

Quite literally. Oh the joys of being female... But we won't get into that, because as I've said before, this is a family friendly blog, and the guys don't wanna hear about it.

But I will tell you how the last couple days have gone down. Yesterday, I actually had a fairly decently good day! It was Wednesday, which meant half day at school. First hour with the Père Boly, second hour in Social Sciences, and the last two in French. Right after school, Talia and I went to the gym, but since it was rainy and cold and gross outside, like Belgium has been lately, we decided to grab the bus, thinking it would be faster. Well, it wasn't. We stopped at one of the bus stops, and these guys in uniforms got on. Turns out they were the "conductors" for the buses. They go around the bus and make sure that everyone on it either has a bus pass that is valid or they paid for the ride. That is the first time it's ever happened to me. They do it sporadically and nobody ever knows when they'll be coming on the bus. I think somebody got fined because they had the wrong kind of bus pass, but I'm not sure.

Anyways, we got to the gym and Talia and I worked out for about an hour. I ran on the treadmill for the first time in a long time, and it was sadly tiring. I only did about ten minutes. But I also think I might be developing shin splints, which would be terrible, so I also have to take that easy. But all in all, it was fine, as usual. After we finished at the gym, we went back into Hannut and met up with Aymeric. Well, Talia met up with him. I tagged along for food (yes I know) at Point Chaud, where I had a mozzarella and tomato panini, and then I was outta there. I had texted a couple people to figure out when my bus passed through and they told me every hour at 5 after. So I planned on that and walked to the stop. But then it got to be 20 after and there was no bus. And it was rainy and the wind was blowing. So I was frustrated. And I walked back to the Grand Place and down one of the main roads, looking for a bus schedule, but of course every schedule is posted except for the 127. So eventually I just stopped at one of them and waited, figuring that a bus would have to come by eventually. About an hour after the original time I planned on, the bus pulled up. So it did come ever hour at 5 after, just not to the stop that I had thought. So really, I ended up standing in the rain for over an hour, waiting for a bus, because I didn't know that they don't always stop at all the stops. So Which is confusing. What is also confusing is that when I take that bus after school, it goes through a few villages before mine, but yesterday it went straight to Bertrée. Weird. But my conclusion is that the Belgian bus system has conspired with the Belgian weather to make me miserable. They both suck.

Once I got home, I didn't really do anything... It was already like 5 30pm, and I watched a whole bunch of "How I Met Your Mother" and finished season 2 while eating chocolate and peanut butter because I was craving it. Don't judge me. Then my host mom called me, asking where I was, and when I told her I was in the house, she laughed and said she didn't hear me upstairs so she wasn't sure if I was there. I laughed too and went down to dinner and ate with her. We had pork that had ham and cheese inside it and was breaded. And along side that was a carrot and potato mixture that was very good. It was already late and we had missed the news, so I went up to bed after that.

This morning I woke up and went to school as usual, but in a really bad mood. Lately, I've been feeling like a Coke bottle that a little kid has been shaking to see how long it will take before the lid just bursts off. I've just been feeling all kinds of stress and anxiety and everything building up inside of me. I want to go somewhere and scream, but I can't because I really think that it would freak out my host parents... Anyways, I have been predicting for a while when the big meltdown was going to happen, because I knew it was coming. Originally I had predicted it for today, but then I had such a good day yesterday (aside from the whole bus situation) that I thought I would make it til the weekend. But then during my Science class today, my little friend decided to pay me a visit. And tear my body apart in the process. Long story short, I ate my lunch but was in so much pain that I ended up alone in Père Boly's office for the rest of the lunch hour and the next hour (I had study hall). Talia had a few Advil that I was able to take, but they didn't seem to do much. The last time I had pain that bad was in the States and I had almost gone to the hospital because of it. One of my biggest fears lately has been that it was going to happen again while I was here and the fact that it happened in school made it so much worse. So needless to say, that did a great deal in bringing on the predicted anxiety attack.

When the pain gets that bad, I get to a point where I can neither sit nor stand nor walk nor lay down. Nothing feels comfortable. I'm just in pain. So there I was, laying on the bed in his office, alone, crying and twitching, trying to make it go away. Eventually I ended up kneeling on the floor with my torso laying across the bed and I fell asleep. That is how it happened last time too, except I fell asleep with my head in my mother's lap. I woke up when Talia and Mikayla and Eduardo came back from their adventures in Hannut. And I woke up with lines on my face from the blanket. The pain was way less, but it was still kind of there and I was worried so I called Colette and caught a bus home. This time, I waited at the right stop, and caught a decently timed bus.

I got home and ate a sandwich and then went upstairs where I ate more peanut butter and chocolate and watched "Frasier". I wasn't feeling too bad, and I ended up falling into a really restless sleep. The nap lasted a few hours, but I woke up quite a few times because the pain and cramps started to come back in waves. The thing about my cramps is that they radiate to my back and all the way down my tailbone instead of normal people who just get them in the lower stomach region, so there is no such thing as a comfortable position when they get that bad. Eventually I could not sleep anymore. This is when the big part of the meltdown happened and I sat in my bed and cried for a good hour. Just cried and cried. It was quite sad. Eventually, my host dad came up and asked me if I wanted to eat something. So I dried my eyes and tried to pull myself together because I knew that I should eat something good. By this time it was 8 30pm. I clearly wasn't going to my dance class tonight.

I get downstairs and both my host parents are smiling at me and trying to make me feel better. My host mom gave me a hug! A legitimate hug! I cried again, but I wasn't embarrassed, and they didn't laugh at me or make me feel uncomfortable. She just hugged me again and I dried my eyes and everything was ok. And I don't know what it was about it, but everything was just so warm and comforting and even though I was in a lot of pain, I felt better because they were just so sweet. Not even in an outwardly obvious sort of way. I don't know what it was. But I just feel so much more at home here. It's like they have really taken me in as their daughter. They gave me some meds, which I normally would refuse, but the pain was getting to be unbearable again. Colette had already made me a plate of food, so they just threw it in the microwave for me and both of my host parents sat down with me while I ate. It was a vegetable medley with some spices and a couple of meatballs. Which were really delicious. And then I had a sort of yogurt thing for dessert, but it didn't have much of a flavor so I added some jelly to some of it and honey to another part. I really love it here.

After I finished eating, I went back up to my room and talked with people, including my mom. And now I'm going to try to sleep again. I'm not sure that I will go to school tomorrow. We will see how I feel when I wake up. Right now, I'm ok. But as far as how it goes in the morning, we'll find out. But for now, sleepy time. Bonne nuit tout le monde.

Chicken Paprikash

So about that party last night... I didn't go. Because I started to feel sick. And I really freaked out. If you know me, or if you've at least been keeping up with the blog, you know that I am deathly afraid of puking. And my host mom and brother came down with a sort of stomach flu the other day. And then yesterday, I was fine all morning. I went to the gym and worked out for 2 hours (and did really freaking great too), came home and cleaned my room and continued writing my Christmas cards and putting together the few packages I'm going to send, and worked out rides and stuff to get to the party. It was all ready to go. And then I decided to take a shower. And all of the sudden my stomach just started hurting. I wrote it off at first, but then it started to really bother me. So then I said, oh it's just an anxiety attack since I'm so freaked out by the rest of the people around me being sick. Plus my host mom had conveniently told me that it was on the news how there have been a lot of cases of stomach flu in Belgium this winter. So needless to say, I was nervous about it. So I said I would just wait a couple hours and see how I was. I laid down in my bed and began watching "The Princess Bride" and told my host mom I wasn't feeling well and didn't know if I was gonna go to the party. Eventually I started to feel a little better, but still decided not to go because I knew I would kick myself the next day if I got sick from going out when I wasn't in good shape. So I stayed home. Over the course of the night, I drank only water, didn't eat anything, and watched "The Princess Bride", "Ella Enchanted", and "Men in Tights". Kind of on a medieval/Cary Elwes kick. But I enjoyed myself. The I watched "Bride Wars", and then fell asleep to an episode of "Big Bang Theory".

I woke up this morning feeling tip top. I ate breakfast, continued with my Christmas stuff, and then after lunch, did some more Christmas shopping with my host mom. Don't worry, I didn't buy anything. Then for dinner I decided to try my hand at one of my dad's classic recipes: chicken paprikash. I had him send me the recipe last night and my host mom got some sour cream for me and I was doing great with it! The chicken was cooking perfectly and I had the sauce simmering and everything.

And then I tried to make the dumplings.

I totally failed. I'm just going to come right out and say it. I can't make dumplings to save my life. I don't know what was wrong with them. But they would not cook through. I put them in the boiling water by the spoonful just like Daddy said. And I was texting him simultaneously and he told me to just keep boiling them, but they wouldn't cook. They turned out totally yucky looking and they didn't taste right either. So I threw away the first attempt, changed the batter a little with more flour, but take two was no good either. So in the end, we ended up just making some pasta and my host mom and I sat down to eat. I have to say though, I totally aced the sauce and chicken. The sauce was a little bit richer than I'm used to, and I'm not sure if there was too much sour cream or I'm just all adjusted to the less flavorful Belgian food. Regardless, it tasted good and my host mom LOVED it. My host dad then came home and tasted it too and he said it was also very good. So I win :) And it was not bad over pasta, though it would have been better if I had done the dumplings right... But the chicken was extremely tender and I am very proud of that part.

By this time it was already past 9pm. And now it's past midnight. Which means technically it's Christmas Eve. And it couldn't feel farther from it. But apparently later today I'm going to have the best Christmas meal of my life at my host grandma's house. We'll see! For now, it's sleepy time. Goodnight all!

La Toussaint

Today is November 1st. In the States, this is "All Saints Day". Here, it translates to "La Toussaint". This is the day where we remember all of those people who have died and we celebrate their lives.

In honor of this day, I went with my host family to my host grandparents' house. But this time it was the parents of my host dad. I really did not want to go, though, because last night I found myself really not feeling well during dinner, to the point where I stopped eating entirely because my body was screaming at me. I went up to bed and when I woke up this morning, I still wasn't feeling well. It was a really weird stomach ache that came in waves. Just the thought of doing things or going places or eating (cause I was hungry) caused my body to yell NO at me. So I wasn't feeling like going to a lunch where there would be plenty of food that just looking at it would make me queasy... But I went anyways, met the family, and had some smalltalk conversation before the meal. The crowd consisted of me and my host parents and brothers, my host dad's parents, uncle, and a cousin (who, by the way, was wearing PURPLE PANTS) and his girlfriend. I spent a lot of time talking to her. She was very nice and we talked about a lot of different things. It was kind of hard for me though, because everyone kept offering me wine and food, but the very thought of it made me feel queasy. And I felt like I was being very rude, but nobody seemed to understand that I just really did not feel well. Although my host grandmother did give me some sort of herbal remedy medication...

Luckily, by the time we were ready to eat, I was feeling decent enough to take small portions and eat a full meal. We started off with a vegetable soup. Then we had a sort of meatloaf that had bacon on top of it, cauliflower, another sort of vegetable who's name escapes me (we do not have that in Parma, Ohio), cooked pears with a sort of cherry jelly in the middle of them, and of course, frites. Overall, the meal was very good. We finished it with a cake that my host dad had made that had pears in it. That was delicious, as usual.

After dinner, we spent a little time talking, walking around the garden, and trying not to freeze to death in the cold Belgian air. Then most of us went over to the church around 3pm for the Stations of the Cross. I understood nothing, but I recognized the Hail Mary and said that prayer a few times to myself. We then went over to the cemetery, and that's where I about cracked.

Cemeteries here are so different from in the States. Obviously, they serve the same purpose. But walking into that cemetery, first of all, it was quite a bit smaller. But the graves were not. Not by any means. Every single one was raised out of the ground, with giant plaques coming out of the ground, intricately carved with the persons name and different figures and designs. Most were marble and some had huge cross statues as well. Some had the pictures of the people on the tombstone as well. They were huge and beautiful and detailed and just overwhelming. Not to mention that every single grave was COVERED in flowers. Just covered. And I don't mean people came by and dropped a single rose. I mean HUGE bouquets of flowers everywhere. People had also put plaques with messages on them on the graves. It was astounding. And nobody in that cemetery was crying. Everyone was having conversation, smiling, and praying for their loved ones. It almost made ME cry, because it was just seeing how much the people really do care about the people that they lost. They have mourned the loss, and now they celebrate the life that they lived. It was amazing. I can't even really describe how it made me feel because it was all just so new to me. I am used to going to cemeteries, walking around quietly, solemnly, grieving. Crying. Searching through tiny little stones that are flat against the ground, maybe with the occasional forgotten flower tossed towards it. This was so far from that... It truly was a celebration of life and remembrance. Overwhelming. And beautiful.

And now, I sleep well, knowing that the ones that I have lost, that I love, are happy in heaven with God. And I think fondly of them, and celebrate their lives.

Sick No Longer!

First order of business: My host dad wore normal pants today.

Second order of business: My sore throat is officially gone! It's amazing what a four hour nap can do. Normally, when I'm sick in the States, I go about my life that normal, and it takes a good week to heal. But there is in fact logic to the concept of "rest and lots of fluids". I am living proof! I've never gotten over a cold in one day! Fantastic.

Today, I had one class. Well, I also had my first class with Père Boly, but we spent that on a mission to find Talia coffee. Which we did find, and it was apparently terrible. I'm sorry dear. We also got our school pictures. I actually kind of like mine. It doesn't suck. So anyways, I thought I would have two classes today, but it turns out that my Science teacher was gone too, so I had only History. Which I was ok with, since I worked really hard on my homework and actually wanted to turn it in. After that, I went into town with Mikayla, Talia, and Edwardo. We got lunch and hit up the grocery store. And then I realized that I had left my wallet at home. Idiot, I know. But tomorrow is another day. After realizing that there really was nothing else for us to do, we retired to the café, which is normal for us, and just sat around for a while. My host mom picked me up around 1pm and I accompanied her while she took an old woman to the doctor's. The woman was very nice, but I fell asleep in the car, as I am still a bit foggy and sick ish, and slept through the entire thing. After that, we went grocery shopping, where I actually spoke up for the first time and picked out some things that I wanted, like BabyBell cheese and apples. You know, I really really enjoy grocery shopping. I don't know what it is about it, but I guess it has something to do with my incredible love for food.

Speaking of which, I have put myself on a diet, and it has only been a couple days, but I've been doing pretty well. I resist the Nutella every morning and I don't buy anything from the vending machine. I had a couple pieces of chocolate today at my house, but it wasn't too much and I had two hours of dance after.

Which was fail. I don't know why, but I just was not on in my class at all today. I think part of it was because I really am very tired still, and I'm still a bit sick. Plus I wasn't really into it today. I was zoned out. Hopefully Saturday will go better.

Dinner consisted of chicken sausages, which I found very interesting, but I don't know if I would ask for them again, potatoes, brussel sprouts, which I surprisingly enjoyed, and homemade applesauce, which I love!

Ok there wasn't much substance to this post and it was all over the place, but I just needed to have an upbeat, not so depressive one. I apologize for the sadness that had swept over my blog the last couple days. Hopefully, it's gone for a while! Bonne nuit!

Better Day. And Orange Pants.

I'm going to start a list of the interesting colored pants that my host dad owns. Today, we add orange to the list.

Today was rough. But better than last night. Last night, I had a major breakdown. I haven't cried that much since before I got here. It was pretty bad... And Belgians don't seem to believe in Kleenex so I was blowing my nose in toilet paper. Lovely, right? But I didn't do any crying today, though I came close once or twice when I got really frustrated with life.

Good news is that it is Wednesday and that means that it was only a half day. Now granted, the three hours of real courses that I did have (the first was Père Boly as usual, which doesn't count), all we did was take notes while our substitute teacher lectured. And this was incredibly frustrating for me, as she talked very fast, and everyone was speed writing and I just could not keep up, though I tried. I have found that if I just listen, I can usually understand, but the minute I start writing, my focus is split and I fall behind extremely quickly. It's not good. Plus, I'm sick. I now have a full blown sore throat and I am exhausted. Good news is that it seems to be just the throat. My head is fine, my nose is fine, I don't have a fever or a stomach ache. So hopefully this will pass soon. I slept for about four hours after school today (after a wonderful lunch of vegetable soup and omelet) and I'm sure that I will still sleep a full night tonight. After that four hour nap, I did feel much better, though I just sat around like a couch potato all afternoon and all night. Which I'm ok with.

Tomorrow, I only have to go to school in the morning because my afternoon teachers won't be there. Yay! So I will probably sleep more tomorrow night ha.

Today, I read a lot of posts on other blogs that I follow about body image. It seems to kind of be a theme for today. And it was so incredibly helpful. I'm quite grateful for it. Because that is what my entire breakdown last night was all about. It's funny how God works, eh? Through blog posts :) But I am being very cautious about what I eat now. And there is Belgian chocolate in my room and it is taunting me. I was supposed to run today, but I think the fact that I'm sick is a good excuse. Besides, it's so dang cold! But I do have dance tomorrow so we'll see how that goes...

This blog post is really spiratic and ADD but hey, that's me. It's 9pm now and I am going to do some homework and then go to bed. Bonne nuit tout le monde.