Hello Homesickness

Today was the roughest day I've had in a long time. I really am not entirely sure why, but the interesting part is that my mother was feeling pretty blue today as well. We seem to be connected over time and space in a weird way... Not to mention I really miss my (not) boyfriend. I woke up this morning with a rumbling stomach, but couldn't eat because I just did not feel good and my body didn't want food. It took quite a bit of effort to make myself eat at lunchtime. I've just been really distracted the last couple days. And I've been a day off. It really feels like Tuesday and it's felt like the day after for a good week now. I can't understand why. Probably because there is no school and no dance to keep my internal calendar up to date...

This morning I went to the gym for two hours, but before that, my host mom dropped me off at the post office to send off my Christmas packages. By the way, the United States gets one point for the USPS. I officially love the United States Postal Service, and will forever be gracious towards everyone who does/ever has worked there. Belgium, you're awesome, but your postal system sucks. I'll get back to that in a minute. I also have a bone to pick with Rotary. I depend on my monthly stipend to go into the bank of the 1st of every month, because that was what they told me was going to happen back in November. But of course, it wasn't there today and the post office doesn't take Visa, so I had to leave my ID card at the post office and run, literally, to the town square because the ATM by the post office was out of order (OF COURSE), and in Belgium, you're lucky if there's more than one ATM in every city. So I ran there and ran back, paid to send the packages, and then went to work out for two hours. But I hadn't eaten yet and I was exhausted and distracted and just not at the top of my game. The stair climber kicked my butt.

Around 1pm, Karine came to get me and we went to another post office to pick up a package that my parents had sent from the States, because you know, the mail man can't drop it off at the house. Again, USPS guys, you rock. What happens here is when you get a package, sometimes they leave you a slip in the mailbox that says it's here and you have to come pick it up from whichever post office. I got the slip last week. But because it's Belgium, the post office is always closed. Finally, we got to go today. Oh and I had to pay the taxes. Because it's Belgium. But of course, the post office was CLOSED. It wouldn't open for another fifteen or twenty minutes, so we went home and ate lunch, which was a pasta thing that my host dad had made. Then me and my host mom went to go get my package, which was surprisingly small and I don't understand why they couldn't drop it off at the house. OH and another about the Belgian post, if the weather isn't good, they just don't bring the mail. Once again, USPS, rain or shine, blazing hot or freezing cold, tornado or tsunami, they bring you your mail. Plus one, United States.

Obviously I'm a little down on Belgium today. I didn't do much with the rest of my day. I edited some more pictures, listened to music, talked to my mother, watched some Frasier. Then I went out to that Chinese restaurant with my host parents and Benoit. It was pretty delicious. I really like their wonton soup. And I didn't have a cup with an obscene picture in the bottom this time. The dinner conversation got me a little worked up too.

Here's something the Belgians can't get through their heads: The United States is BIG. Yes, there are problems, and yes there are corrupt people. But HELLO!! That happens everywhere! But there are a gagillion people in the States, so obviously the numbers are going to be higher and the problems magnified. And things are done differently in different regions. For example, all the Rotary clubs in Belgium are run pretty much the same way. But you can fit three Belgiums inside one Ohio. So obviously, my Rotary club is going to be different from Talia's, and both of ours are going to be different from Mikayla's too, because it's too big to keep everything consistent when different ways each work fine. That's just an example. But anyway, I wish the Belgians could understand that. But of course, I still don't know enough words in French to accurately convey that, though I tried. And I did not lose my temper, though I was so exhausted that I thought my head would explode.

Then I got home, edited pictures, and now I'm contemplating sleep. I switch families in three days. It's pretty nuts. Tomorrow, I don't have any plans, but I''m sure I'll go work out and maybe get my bus pass... Finally. Anyways, goodnight world.

Red pants today.

Beastin' Up The Blog

This the third post I have for the day... And it's the last, I promise. This is my average, this-is-what-I-did-today post.

Last night, I spent the night at Talia's. This seems to be becoming a regular occurrence. One that I thoroughly enjoy! We watched "Julie & Julia". Which means that I have now seen that movie three times since I've gotten here. And I don't mind one bit. I love that movie! But of course, what is a sleepover without girl talk? We paused the movie multiple times to talk about the States and what we miss about home. Not even so much homesickness conversation, just the little things that we miss. This is what we came up with:

-Mac and Cheese

-Peanut Butter

-Driving (this is a big one)

-College-ruled paper

-Black pens

-Texting

-Cake

-Breakfast with eggs and pancakes

-Artificial, fattening food (ironic, huh?)

-French toast (you'd think they'd have it here, right?)

-Warmth or cold... Not in between

-Being barefoot

-Spending every spare moment with people

There were more, but this is what I remember right now.

Anyways, I left Talia's around 11 for dance. And I have to say, I am beyond grateful that I get to dance here. It is one of the most stress-relieving, freeing things I do. Not even that, but it's so different here for me... The dancing is not different, it's basically the same thing. But the fact that I have no idea what anyone's saying (other than the steps, cause they were in French in the States too) and I don't know what people think about my dancing makes me dance that much better. I'm not worrying about impressing anyone or out dancing anyone or standing out or anything like that. I'm just worrying about doing something that I love. And when that's what is on my mind, I do so much better. If I do say so myself, I danced beautifully today. I felt like I was floating, all through class. One thing I did understand today, was after our leaps, the teacher said that mine were beautiful. She said that I flew through the air. And that just made me feel so good inside. After so much soul-searching this week, that compliment was the perfect little me-boost :)

After class, I went home and ate lunch with the family. Because it was Saturday, it was a big, nice lunch. And I tried a couple different kinds of cheeses... One that actually had ashes in it. I'm not entirely sure why, I couldn't understand everything my host dad was telling me... But regardless it was tasty. Of course that could be because I just really like cheese...

After lunch, I went with my host parents and Damien to a little castle. Just because we could. It was beautiful. They were doing all kinds of restoration on it and every room was gorgeous. My favorite part, though, was the toilet. Because it looked like a throne. Literally! It was upholstered and everything. Very regal, with a nice pile of toilet paper rolls next to it. The grounds were gorgeous too. And they had a machine that cut the lawn by itself! It was like a Roomba for the grass! I thought it was pretty cool. There was also a private church on the grounds and we went to see that too. It was little, but it was breathtaking. I make it a habit not to take pictures in churches, but with this one I just could not resist. So beautiful.

We then went back home and I went for my bike ride, which is all written about in the previous post. Then I came home, ate dinner (pasta with chicken and zucchini, salad with some sort of flower petals in it, bread and cheese... yummm) and that was the end of my night. I went up to my room and continued to write three blog posts :)

Church in the morning. I will understand none of it. Goodnight!

9/11 In Belgium

Today, I will post multiple times. Because there are certain issues that I cannot talk about in the same post as others. This is one of those issues.

Nine years ago, the Twin Towers were destroyed. Nine years ago, the country mourned the losses of friends, family members, coworkers, acquaintances, people they didn't even know. Nine years ago, the United States of America put aside their differences, and came together to battle through this tragic, heart-wrenching event. And on every eleventh day, of the ninth month of the year, since 2001, we have stopped to think of every single one of those people, and sit in silence, and remember.

I am in Belgium today. Today, which has become one of the most patriotic days in American history. And being here, being in a place where this day is just September 11th, 2010, with no real significance, has opened my eyes to my true patriotism. Like any American, I have my qualms with the government, I have my opinions. I like to stay out of politics because I hardly every agree with the decisions being made. But regardless of my political standings or my opinions, the fact is that I am an American. And I went through this day just like everyone else. And even though I was only a mere nine years old when those Towers fell, I will never forget the fear and worry and grief that I felt when I finally found out why we weren't allowed outside for recess on that gorgeous, sunny day.

This day has been an eye-opener for me. Every day, I go through life, not even thinking about the fact that I have an identity as American. But today, I realize how attached I am to it. We all know the phrase "You don't know what you have until it's gone." I woke up this morning with a kind of emptiness. I didn't really understand why, but now I do. I wasn't home for this day of remembrance and it felt like a piece of myself was missing. But it was never gone, because no matter where I go, or what I do, I am still myself. I am still an American.

I am an American. And like every other American, on this day, I remember the souls of those people, and of every person that has risked their lives for our country. Even more so for those who lost theirs. And I pray for those people, and their families. Especially, on this day.